HAPPY BIRTHDAY TAMMY!!!!

Today is one of my best friend's birthday! Woohoo!! We have known each other for a very long time. We first met when we were both singing with the New Life Ambassadors. I thought she was a snob (love you Tam), but turns out she's not and we became fast friends. We had a blast singing together and I was so sad when she became a Senior and wouldn't be in the group anymore. But little did I know that's when our friendship would really blossom.

We have been through a LOT of ups and downs, but our friendship stays the same. We don't get together as much as I would like either, but when we do get together, it seems like we've been together everyday. We are able to pick up where we left off.

Tammy, thank you for being such a great friend. Someone I can talk to about anything and I know you will listen. Thanks for all the many prayers you have prayed for me. I am so blessed to have you in my life. You are a treasure!!!

I LOVE YOU TAMMY!!!!

My girl Bailey Jo

This is my new puppy Bailey Jo Combs. Isn't she a cutie. I got her on Friday from my cousin Gina. Bailey's daddy is a border collie and her mom is part Great Pryenese and Commodore. I am in TROUBLE. I had a Pryenese before and she got to be about 80 lbs or so, but with Commodore added to it, OH NO! My brother had a Commodore and he was huge. When he hiked his leg he peed all over my cousins car window. I'm kind of excited to see how big she gets.

I got her because I want a "big" dog to take on walks with me. We have beagles but they are too busy trying to find a rabbit trail and don't care about walking. Besides, there has been a bear around our area and I feel that when Bailey gets big, she would be more able to scare the bear away then the tiny beagles! ha! She has a pink camo collar and of course I had to get her a pink leash to match.

Yesterday I went out to feed our calves their bottles and I heard a little meow. I went into the field and tried to follow the sound. I found him. A tiny kitten that got left behind. He was so tiny and so cute. I took him up to his mom and she took him in and nursed him. Hopefully he will be feeling better soon!

Well, that's all the news I have for now at "Boyd and KK have a farm, E..I..E..I..O" ha!

The Valley

I love the mountain tops. But with the mountain tops, come the valley's in between. That's where I am at right now. Being raised in church my whole life, and being a preacher's kid, sometimes people think I have it all together. That couldn't be further from the truth. I struggle just like everyone else, sometimes daily. Especially here lately. There are some days, I'm completely at peace about not being able to have our own children, then there are days, like the past week, I'm completely upset about it and mad. I look at pregnant women or people who have children and am totally envious and jealous of them. I want their life, but more importantly I want what God wants for my life.

We took our foster care classes but everytime we get close to actually signing our license, they come up with another piece of paperwork that's missing. AHHHH!! Sometimes life is just so unfair. I think Boyd and I would be great parents and I just don't understand why it is so hard to make that happen. If Boyd was closer to my age, then I would say we have more time, but he will be turning 50 next year. I know the Lord's timing is perfect, and people keep telling me that, but when I'm in the valley, it goes in one ear and out the other. It just plain makes me mad.

I haven't been singing specials at church lately, because my heart and mind aren't where they need to be. I've been going to church and sitting though the messages, but wasn't really hearing what was being said.

Well, yesterday was different! I went to church and my friend Mel got up to sing a special and she sang "my" song...

I choose by Ivan Parker

Master, may I be so honest
Could I admit the way I feel?
I’m hurting, it seems that you’ve forsaken
I wonder, is Your love for me still real?
Though my friends think that I am happy
Unaffected by this trail
They can’t see the pain I’m hiding
Just under my smile
Master, I can’t live this way anymore

So today I make my choice

Chorus
I choose to believe that You are faithful
And my heart is in Your hands
And this mystery that I face today
Is part of a greater plan
I choose not to be discouraged
When the sun will not break through
I have the choice of trusting you
So Lord this is what I choose

I know this road will not be easy
I know I’ll have my weaker days
And Satan will tell me I don’t mean it
When I say, “I’ll trust God all the way”
But that doesn’t really matter
I refuse to hear him out
With my faith I’ll find the power
That will overcome all doubt
Lord, I’ve never felt so strong
As when I’m resting in your arms

Chorus
I choose to believe
That this mystery that I face today
Is part of a greater plan
I choose not to be discouraged
When the sun will not break through
I have the choice of trusting you
So, Lord this is what I choose


That was it. I began sobbing, not crying. You know the sound you make when you try to hold it in and then you have to let it lose. I went down to the altar in the middle of her song. I couldn't even say the words, I was crying so hard, but the Lord knew what I was thinking and knew my heart. I went back and sat down and then Pastor Jeff's sermon was SO for me. I walked away feeling so much better. I'm not saying I won't be in the valley again, but I DO KNOW that the Lord will be waiting on me with open arms and tell me everything will be alright. In HIS time.

So, I'm trusting the Lord and am leaning on my friend Tammy's favorite verse...
Jeremiah 29:11 (New International Version)
11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

I CHOOSE TO BELIEVE!!!

Calf Business

I wanted to introduce you to the little guy that is taking up all my free time. His name is Hercules. We bought him from a sweet lady who was trying to bottle feed him because his momma died while giving birth to him. His name is Hercules and he is SO much fun.

He is part Charolais Bull and is so cute. We have just recently started letting him out of his pin to play. He just runs and bucks and really cuts a shine. I'm a little concerned that when he gets older, he may be better suited to be a bull in a rodeo. We'll have to see.

I've had a lot of fun with him. We did buy another bottle calf at the Ava Sale Barn while I was on vacation. She was a Holstein Heifer and we named her, "Ava". But she died on Monday due to many different sicknesses. We would get her better from one and she would get something else. It was sad. But we still have Hercules and he's going to be extra spoiled now.

Hopefully next Spring we can buy some more. I've had a LOT of fun with them. We have a lot of calves in our other field, but we can't get close enough to them to play because "Big Bertha" mommas don't seem to want us messing with their calf.

We are sure enjoying him!!

Mother's Day

I had one of the best Mother's Day and one of the hardest Mother's Day. I'll start with the best. This was the first time in 7 years I was able to go to church with my mom. After church we all met up and ate together. Mom had all 4 of her kids with her and most of the grandkids and great grandkids. We had a great time. After we ate we went to dad and mom's and fished at the pond. I think everyone had such a great time.

Thanks mom for all you have done for me and all you continue to do for me. Thanks for being my mom and my best friend. I love you!

On the way to the farm to fish. Boyd, Me, Jessica andRyan

Kevin, Me, Jessica

Caleb on the phone with Uncle Boyd

My 3 brothers, Ron, Rob, and Kevin and nephews Ryan and Caleb

Dad in his lovely hat and my great nephew Trey

Trinity and Sheila sitting in the truck out of the rain.

Fishing on the pond bank.

5-7 years ago we put some goldfish in the pond and now they have grown huge. Bubby caught one.

Papa Kevin and Bryce with their big catch.

Ok, with the not so good Mother's Day. This year has been the hardest one for yet. Don't get me wrong, I'm VERY thankful I still have my mother because I know that a lot of people don't. But I want to be a mother so bad myself that it was hard to be in the service and have all the mother's recognized while I sat there with tears in my eyes, wanting so badly for my own children. I was visiting my brother's church and the gentleman did such a good job. He even brought up those who can't have children of their own and I completely lost it then. Then of course as we were walking out, there were people standing at the back to hand out "mother's day" bookmarks and books. I panicked. I looked for another way out the door, but couldn't find one. So I headed out the door and the little girl, bless her heart, she didn't know what I was feeling, started to hand me a book and I said no thank you, I'm not a mother. Well apparently my niece was close by, who told her mom what had happened and she came outside and gave me a hug and a book and told me that I would be a mom one day and that I was a mom to her kids. So more tears came. I just had a pity party that day, but got over it after a little while.

I am so blessed in many ways. I have such a loving husband, wonderful parents and extended family and great friends. One day, I will get my miracle. It may not be our own child, but maybe by adoption. I'll be thankful either way.

Please remember to pray for all those people who can't have their own kids or who have lost their children. Can't imagine what they are going through at this time.

Here are a couple of videos that I did from last night.

The first one is of Boyd on his "pony" ride being led around by his wife. It was pretty funny. I'm anxious for him to get use to riding the horses so we can actually go on separate horses and he doesn't have to be led around. He was slightly embarrassed that we were videoing this whole ordeal, especially when he found out it was going on the internet. But he such a good sport! Love you honey!!

The second video is of Trinity and Caleb riding together. They are so cute. And there's a little shot of Ron and my horse Sissy. She was feeling left out so Ron went and got her and brought her down.

ENJOY!!!

Welcome Home Dad and Mom!

April 23rd, 2009 mom and dad pulled into Bradleyville. They are home, well at least until next Monday and then they'll be gone until August. But, oh well. At least they will be here part of the time.

I put of some signs starting at Taneyville and I'll write down what a bunch of them said... "Hi mom and dad. Welcome Back", "Home Sweet Home", "Bradleyville Bound", "Welcome back to Taney County", "Answered Prayer", "You are Loved", "You were Missed", "7 years is long enough", etc.


This one was on the mailbox with some balloons. The balloons didn't last long with the heat, but they got the point.

Here they are pulling in.































And another one of the signs. We use to have Sunday dinners with them every Sunday after church. Now we can again.













Here's dad and mom getting out of the rig. 8 hours is a long trip. They were happy to be HOME!